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Texas Justice

 
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Gollalron
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Joined: 07 Apr 2003
Posts: 109

PostPosted: Thu Dec 18, 2003 8:01 pm    Post subject: Texas Justice

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A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural Texas. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing.

The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this feild, and now I'm going to retrieve it."

The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

The indiganant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the United States and , if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own."

The old farmer smiled and said' "Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes in Texas. We settle small disagreements like this with the "Three Kick Rule"

The lawyer asked, "What is the Three Kick Rule."

The farmer replied, "Well because the dispute occurs on my land, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so on back and forth until someone gives up."

The attorney quickly though about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth. The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Ok, Now it's my turn."


The Old Farmer smiled and said, "Naw, I give up. You can have the duck."




Gollalron

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Durinda
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Joined: 25 Apr 2003
Posts: 379
Location: Rivervale, Norrath

PostPosted: Thu Dec 18, 2003 8:44 pm    Post subject:

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ROFLMAO Exclamation Exclamation
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tenri
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Joined: 15 Sep 2003
Posts: 939
Location: Chicago IL

PostPosted: Thu Dec 18, 2003 9:14 pm    Post subject:

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Laughing Thats the best one i have read in a long time Laughing

ROFLMFAO
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Ya Ya i know shut up skinny necro boy Twisted Evil

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Mildane
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Joined: 19 Feb 2002
Posts: 1274
Location: Plane of Hate

PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2003 1:08 am    Post subject:

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hehehe
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Elnrik Talshiar
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Joined: 23 Jul 2003
Posts: 820
Location: Denver, CO

PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2003 1:54 am    Post subject:

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LOL, nice one.
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stoneclaww
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Joined: 20 Aug 2003
Posts: 287

PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2003 10:18 am    Post subject:

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OMG that is awesome ROFL !!!!
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never come to a battle of wits with no ammunition

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BonlainyT
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Joined: 08 Jan 2003
Posts: 3942

PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2003 12:52 pm    Post subject:

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You all think this is a joke, but I can really see it happening in South Texas. Old codger farmers and ranchers don't take kindly to people on their land, no matter what.

I have always loved this one though, thanks for posting it Goll, funny stuff.
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IddinLunasglory
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Joined: 16 Oct 2002
Posts: 504
Location: Denver Co

PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2003 2:51 pm    Post subject:

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Shocked
Lol
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Roshambou (sp?) ya fer it

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