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Warning: Alcohol Causes Things

 
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tenri
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Joined: 15 Sep 2003
Posts: 939
Location: Chicago IL

PostPosted: Mon Nov 10, 2003 8:49 am    Post subject: Warning: Alcohol Causes Things

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The FDA is considering additional warnings on beer and alcohol bottles, such as:

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an jerk.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can't remember).

WARNING: consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really big guy named Thor.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause an disruption in the space-time continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to "disappear."

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy.
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Tenri Death

Ya Ya i know shut up skinny necro boy Twisted Evil

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stoneclaww
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Joined: 20 Aug 2003
Posts: 287

PostPosted: Mon Nov 10, 2003 9:40 am    Post subject:

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Quote:
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants.


Clearly I need to close my blinds....you know too much
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Stoneclaww click the link....feel the gimpness for yourself

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never come to a battle of wits with no ammunition

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Aulan Plainsong
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Joined: 29 Sep 2003
Posts: 52
Location: SF Bay Area, Ca

PostPosted: Mon Nov 10, 2003 2:07 pm    Post subject:

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Like stone, I dont know whether to laugh or look for those following me around when Im drunk and writing all this stuff down!

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