The new AA's have finally been revealed as follows.
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So theres this strict nondisclosure agreement about the DoDh beta. I agreed to it, sure. But then I also told the landlord the rent would be on time this month, and I told myself about 700 AAs ago that I was going to cut back on EQ.
I tooled around, played with some mobs, etc. etc, but you dont care about all that. You want to know what AAs are coming, and really thats all I wanted out of the beta myself.
Im sure some of these are going to be tweaked, removed or replaced, but as per what I saw as I created a toon of each class, here they are.
All Classes
Old Faithful
Only works in the Guild Hall. Upon zoning in, if you become trapped in an AFK toon, activating this ability causes a geyser to erupt beneath the offending party that plasters them against the Guild Hall ceiling and leaves them hanging there like a chandelier. The second rank of this ability leaves them hanging there like a piata.
Advanced Alcohol Tolerance
This ability enhances the effects of being drunk. The first rank allows you to do property damage with your horse. The second rank makes you think youre a really good player even if you totally suck. The third rank logs you into a Shadowhaven hotel room, smelling of troll and blissfully ignorant as to why theres a ball gag in your face slot.
Methodology of the Cheese
This ability, when turning trader mode on, automatically searches for the lowest price listed for any item in your trader satchels, then lowers your price by exactly one plat.
Omission of Idgaf
This passive ability affects people you only hear from when they want to lord some uber new piece of gear over you. Upon linking the item, its deleted from their inventory.
Warmth of Yesteryear
This ability adds soft lighting, sappy music and chirpy birds every time you click on some bank-clogging piece of junk you havent worn since Dervs were good exp.
Hoarding Efficiency
Five ranks. Each rank increases by 10 the number of AA points you can bank.
Day of Rest
This ability makes the Creator unavailable for 24 hours.
Transmit Ignore
This ability adds your targets name to the ignore list of everybody on your friends list thus saving them from ever having to go through what you just did.
Eyes of Archie Bunker
This ability makes all players that merged to your server appear on your screen as 1940s European immigrants. The second rank allows you to voice emote, Aw, jeez. Wouldja look at that.
Eyes of Genghis Khan
For players who were merged from their native server to another, this ability sends you a message every time a worthwhile target pops in any zone. Second rank summons a flock of seagulls that voice emote Mine mine mine mine mine mine mine.
PAL/SHD/WAR
Unification of Church and State
If there are two or more clerics in your group, this ability gives you control of all of their spell bars, guarantying you that at least one of them is going to heal.
Clarion Call of Vindication
This ability displays your failed taunt messages to the entire group.
Garden Hose of the Furious
This ability summons an Avatar of Walther Mathau that chases off swarm pets before they can push the mob so far out of position its agroing people in an adjacent zone.
BRD/MNK/NEC/SHD
Gift of Spock
This ability lets you know where any mob will warp to.
Gift of Picard
This ability renders you bald, so youll no longer pull your hair out when a named youve successfully navigated halfway across MPG gets pasted by a group heading for trials.
Gift of Lucas
This ability will make your group eagerly await your next pull, no matter how atrocious your last pull was.
BER
Call of the Lonely
This ability influences other berserker mains to join your guild so youll no longer feel like your only brethren are twinks.
BRD
Fires of Remembrance
This passive ability causes intense bursts of pain in your wrists if you even think about disrespecting /melody.
Pay Your Dues
This ability allows you to remove /melody from twink bards.
Cultural Awareness
This ability explains why, in troll illusion, the animation for percussion songs involves rubbing the drum into your armpit.
BST
Central Park Lure
This ability makes your warder so cute it allows you to strike up conversations with women.
CLR
Divine Empathy of Repetition
This ability instils in players of other classes a sudden feeling of having worked on an assembly line for forty years, endlessly pressing the same three buttons over and over again, without ever being fully appreciated for assuming, full time, this monotonous task.
DRU
Return of the Cabbage
This ability appends all your spells names with of the Cabbage. Cmon, you miss it. You know you do.
ENC
No Room at the Inn
This ability allows you to mez the puller.
MAG
Summon Balls
This ability allows you to conjure a pair for the raid force that spent six hours setting up and now wants to call it quits without engaging because the 12k tank logged off or one of the chanters is LD.
MNK
Extended Faking
Allows you to fake paying attention, fake caring, and fake orgasms.
NEC
Bone Daddies
This ability summons a trio of skeletal bards that will play Parisian style Jazz and choke the air with opium smoke until all the mobs in the area of affect are wearing berets and growing short, pointed goatees. Mobs thus affected can still be killed, but theyll be cool with it.
PAL
Lay on Feet
This ability kicks you in the a$ every time you burn your LoH one tenth of a second before the CH lands.
RNG
Sneaky Enhancement
This ability allows your buffs to hide behind other buffs when people are trying to click them off.
ROG
Laundering
This ability allows you to remove all the totally worthless rubbish from your guild vault and put it in another guilds vault.
SHD
Farm Touch
This ability compels the target to run out and copulate with the first barnyard animal they can find.
SHM
Exploitable Cannibalism
This ability summons a film crew and a South American soccer team.
WAR
Magnanimity of Hate
This ability allows you to 100% lock a mobs agro on the player that keeps taking it from you. Second rank makes all mob agro lock on target player until they zone. Third rank locks agro until the account expires.
WIZ
Wardrobe of Artillery
The first rank of this ability provides Illusion: Trebuchet. You become a towering but rickety catapult that lobs gigantic boulders at the target. The second rank makes you look like a B-52 Bomber. The third ranks says, Ah, f--- it, and turns you into a mushroom cloud.
Group/Raid Leader AAs
GROUP/RAID
Find Path to a$
This ability creates a glowing golden path to a drama queens nether region so he/she can pull their head out of it.
Lesson of Tom Sawyer
This ability allows you to delegate all LAA abilities to another member of the group or raid, letting them feel all cool that they get to designate MT and stuff, while you relax and hog all the leadership experience.
RAID
Spirit of Friday the Thirteenth
This ability summons a hockey-mask-wearing, machete-swinging Avatar of Jason Voorhees that immediately slaughters any players cybering when they should be paying attention to the raid.
Natural Selection
This ability permanently bans the account of any player who pops a Jester of Bristlebane during Trial of Corruption.
Bankers Hours
This ability randomly locks and unlocks the raid so that people think youre at your keyboard.
Let My People Go
Each rank of this ability allows you to increase, by one, the number of players allowed into an instance.
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